2. NON-FOOD PEPPERMINT PRODUCTS

Peppermint: mentha piperita, from the Latin (piper, pepper) and the Greek (mintha, the name of a mythical nymph who metamorphosed into the plant). Used in medicine for a few thousand years, earliest among the Egyptians, Greeks, and Romans; today used to cure such multifarious ailments as stomach upsets and tension headaches. Also commonly used as a flavoring in candy, confections, middle eastern salads, and a few particularly mouthwashy liqueurs. Possessed of strong cooling powers whose source I was unable to discover, though I have a feeling it has something to do with the fact that peppermint contains a large percentage of menthol, which is very volatile and evaporates quickly, taking heat with it. Makes sense, no?

Preferred Applications:

BURT'S BEES BEESWAX LIPBALM
Ingredients: beeswax, coconut oil, sunflower oil, vitamin e, lanolin, peppermint oil, comfrey root extract, rosemary extract. With a few key substitutions (say, "phyllo dough" for "beeswax" and "fine sugar" for vitamin e and lanolin) it sounds like a recipe for Turkish Delight, or at least what I imagined Turkish Delight to be when I first encountered the term in The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe (in which one of our three young heroes is plied with said delicacy by a deceitful sleighriding witch). I was maybe 8 years old and I knew nothing about the religious under/overtones of the Narnia Chronicles (nor, as it turns out, did I know anything about Turkish Delight, which turns out to be more of a nut candy) - I just knew that anyone who'd bestow something so fabulous on a boy she'd just met couldn't be all bad. I've been consistently (if occasionally unwittingly) on the side of the devil ever since.
Which brings us, roundaboutly, to the lip balm - ambrosia in stick form, with a handy plastic dispenser. Its faintly sweet, cool breath on my lips incites me to lascivious lip-smacking and kissing everyone in sight, the better to spread the minty joy. Take that, C.S. Lewis, you stuffy thing!

DR. BRONNER'S PEPPERMINT SOAP
Washing for the first time with Dr. B's peppermint is a revelation - I do hope that your showering partner/soap shopper/whoever introduced you to this fabulous concoction had the good sense to keep silent about its phenomenal powers till after you had experienced them firsthand. Those readers yet inexperienced in the ways of the All-One Soap will please now run out and obtain a bottle and take a nice hot shower, using said soap liberally, before reading further.
There now, aren't you glad I didn't tell you first? You have to experience it for yourself - the bracing smell swirling in the steam of the shower, the first surprising tingle on your tender bits, the persistent thrilling sensation after drying and dressing that you are wearing no pants at all and the wind is even now tickling your curlies. Wooah! Isn't that exciting? The combination of a good scalding shower, a good sweltering day, and the aftereffects of a good lathering with Dr. B's peppermint is not to be underestimated - if done properly, the sensations thus produced can easily beguile away an entire muggy afternoon. Use with care.